not that kind of steroids

Sometimes I swear my doctors don’t communicate, and other times I find myself surprised.  For instance, the pulmonologist that I quit going to see last year (I have another one, it’s all good) put me on Alvesco at the same time that my allergist put me on Pulmicort [in addition to my Symbicort and Atrovent] to see if it would get my asthma in tighter control. [Alvesco and Pulmicort, like FloVent and Qvar, are of the same class of medications, inhaled corticosteroids, which decrease inflammation in the lungs in diseases like asthma and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. Some people respond to different meds better than other ones.] I walked into my primary care doctor’s office and she said “How’s the Alvesco going?” My response? “What Alvesco?”

Things get lost in the shuffle, even though at the time my three doctors were in the same clinic. [I’ve since ditched the above pulmonlogist and am seeing a different one in the outpatient respiratory clinic, but the same primary care doctor and the same allergist]. Fortunately none of these meds are terribly dangerous, and I’m smart enough to figure most of it out (go figure ;)).

Today I had my yearly[ish, i think] appointment with the allergist. For a girl who doesn’t have many allergies [only dust mites, like every other person on the planet basically], that lady sure talks to me for a long time. She even said “Hi Kerri” to me in the hallway as I was sitting there waiting for them to get the spirometer to check my PFTs. She knows my name people. This is not a fab sign.

As Kate said on Twitter:

@__kerri because you're famous!





Yess! I loved this :].

And as my mom said:

@__kerri not the first medical person to do that to you.

[Truth: my pedi orthopedic doc used to go through the back door to x-ray to find us, and then usher us into his office post-x-ray. He knew my mom by her first name, too.]



So the reason I am shocked with the communication bit, is that the allergist said “So you saw [primary care doctor] for an exacerbation awhile ago?” Sheesh, I barely remember this. I had some exercise-induced asthma issue going on and was trying to avoid prednisone but be responsible about the whole bit. I could barely pinpoint the whole event.

As for the rest of the appointment, I didn’t get the numbers but my spiro was good, and the allergist thinks she’s done all the medication reducing we can do while still remaining in a state of more stability regarding the asthma. We have finally struck a balance, and I am happy! Considering I’ve dropped from 3-4 puffs of Symbicort 2-3 times a day by adding in the Qvar and the Atrovent to 1-2 twice a day . . . AND I’ve decreased mmy Atrovent some . . . this is GOOD!  Most importantly, I FEEL better than I did even a year and a half ago.

Unfortunately, though, my sinuses weren’t in check. This is not a huge deal, and rhinitis, both allergic and non-allergic, are common with asthma. Though I’ve noticed some sinus issues, I just typically ignore them and if they get bad-ish and the asthma gets bad simultaneously, I’ll throw an anti-histamine at them. I am kind of whatever towards my sinuses, which is definitely [apparently] not the best attitude to have.

Turns out there is “significant thick mucus” in my sinuses. So that’s gross or whatever. It is probably allergic-rhinitis caused by the dust allergy, so I have to deal with it year-round. And I get to inhale more steroids, into my nose, to deal with it. I guess the more unfortunate bit of it, is that I have to take another medicine and spray it up my nose. Lovely right? Hello Nasonex. More inhaling steroids for me. Gotta love chronic diseases in which you have to take medicine and that basically means forever.

Hello, this is what I mean when I say people with asthma are badasses. Look, I’m snorting steroids AND inhaling them now. Like how much more badass can you get?


Eff, seriously. But whatever, if it helps, I am game. Bring on the Good Things.


My friend Mike posts Mirror Mantras on his bathroom mirror each Monday to help get him through the week [go say happy birthday to him by the way!].

I posted my first Mirror Mantra in my March 12 of 12 last Monday, but why let the goodness stop there considering my mom didn’t make me take the post-it off the mirror, instead just moved it over to the edge of the mirror.

Here’s this week’s:


a tough topic take on God and transformation

About six weeks ago I went to church with my friend and coworker, Jess. We decided that we would do a church-swap of sorts, in which one Sunday I went to church with her and her family, and another she and her family will come to church with me.

When I first started seeking out a church community to be a part of, I tried multiple churches and eventually settled at one that was much like the church I attend now in the way it functions. However, my friend and I, both in our teens, were never reached out to except for by one member of the Welcome Team who sat in front of us each week. Six or so months later, I encountered a subject, on Easter morning, within the sermon that I did not feel fit my beliefs, and I never went back. Since then I have regularly attended two churches: the first, a United church, which remains supportive of rights of people who are part of the LGBTQ[addadditionallettersasyouseefit] community, and loving them for who God created them to be [yes, I am of the thought that a person’s sexual orientation is as inborn as their hair colour, and that it is not a choice],  which I left because at the time I did not feel like there was a place for myself as a young person in the community. The second is my current church, who present such touchy issues of homosexuality and abortion in a facts-based setting, but leave the table open for exploring your own beliefs, and I really respect this approach.

These subjects are difficult for people, especially, it seems, in a faith-based situation, to talk about. Additionally, these discussion can get very emotionally heated, especially when intermingled with the topic of God, which people typically have a very strong position regarding . . . regardless of it is a belief in God or not. Stories, personal accounts, interactions . . . it is obvious that we all have a very vested interest in our own stories and relationships. Thus, relationship with another human, whether intimate or friendship, can often be a touchy subject when those we also care about are concerned about certain aspects of that person’s life–faith, religion, sexual orientation, past choices . . . the list goes on.

If we are, for example, believers in God, I’ve found this is often a very touchy subject.  As a Christian who was not raised a Christian, I think I see this a bit more than the average person. I do not think there is anything wrong with not believing in God, but at the same time, I still hope for everybody to experience the love that is Jesus. it is a tough line, and I choose to simply follow Jesus in my approach . . . love.  Additionally, with many of the above splaying out from what Christian society has told us is good or bad, right or wrong, and how it tries to paint the picture in black and white in a world of colour.  Often, though, this colour comes out in our stories–our teachings, our stories, our tears.

During the church-swap, Jess had warned me that a guest pastor was speaking for the past several weeks, and that he was pretty infused with passion for Jesus. So much so, that whenever he talked about how much Jesus loves us, he cried. Every single time. And while I at the same moments can recollect and often feel the same passion rising within me towards my God, it is of my belief that if you are in the position to be teaching others about the love of Jesus, especially potential new believers OR people who are simply exploring who Jesus is, you need to be able to communicate your passion in a way that educates with a limited emotional attachment. YES, passion and excitement is good, but for instance, if you are counselling an individual and simply reminding them that God loves them [which is essentially what one is doing on a less one-on-one level during a sermon], then you need to be able to step back. Passion is essential in some contexts, but when you are teaching others of a touchy subject, for instance, or presenting potential applications and/or the choices that an individual can make, your story remains your story, and as fuelled as you like it . . . but your point should come with no strings attached, no vested interest, and an ample dose of what you wish to deliver in a fact-based package. Much like the delivery of stance on homosexuality was delivered at my home church.

I was reminded of this scenario when I was reading Jenny Simmons’ blog tonight, in which she writes about speaking to a camp group of some very tough kids in very dark places. On speaking to these kids about Jesus, and His love for them.

I refuse to manipulate on behalf of God. He does not need me to twist anyone’s arm. He does not need tears and lame promises to make Himself known. He is God. To emotionally intimidate people into knowing Him is a terrible offense.

–Jenny Simmons in What if They Were Angels

I fully believe this. I believe that God, from the beginning, has been in the position of ultimate transformation on both a global and individual level. I believe that He finds a way to stir in all of us, at different points in our lives, but that He gives us the will to determine how we respond to this.

That we don’t need cheap rewards and incentive for inviting Him into our journeys.

That it is not up for us to try and manipulate others with our words or our emotions, because He is more than capable.

That He simply loves us where we are at with open arms for when we are ready.

That nothing is ever final enough to divide us from Him.


going out in style . . !

I’ve seen a lot of sights and traveled many miles / shook a thousand hands and seen my share of smiles . . .

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I’m on the road today, quick getaway to North Dakota, so what better to do than make my parents question my sanity by rocking the Dropkick t-shirt and the green tutu with black jeans?


The guy at Hot Topic (immediately pointed me to the Dropkick Murphys tees) and the girl at  Rising Bread Company (super good grilled cheese, by the way) dug it. At least they know what’s up!

I couldn’t really give a shit, I’m going out in style.

–going out in style, dropkick murphys

12 of 12 – march ’12!

On the 12th of each month, a bunch of bloggers from around the world take 12 pictures throughout their day and blog them. Here are my pictures from March 12th, 2012!


9:37 am – bedroom. Yeah, honestly. Now, where’s my backpack at?


12:54 pm – kitchen. Forgot to take any pictures at school, but canned pumpkin is far more exciting. Also it looks gross. Also it got turned into something delicious.


1:25 pm – kitchen. One of my best friends, Donald, making hot chocolate from scratch.


1:41 pm – kitchen. Baking is done and we didn’t even burn anything down!


1:46 pm – kitchen. Hot chocolate is done now too!  So. Good.


1:56 pm -kitchen. Not as good as it sounds.


2:13 pm – kitchen. Pumpkin Pie Brownie from Chocolate Covered Katie!  Better than it looks. And moderately healthy, too! We even subbed the oil for apple sauce.


4:06 pm – work. Got called in to work after school because my coworker Jess is sick and Other Kerry [which is what I call her; also known as “Kerry-with-a-Y” and just “Kerry” whereas I get called “Little Kerri”] is in Mexico!  Played NHL Monopoly for an hour . . . my job is hard.


4:26 pm – work. I owned the Flames for a bit [I traded them], and the Leafs [the second best property, ironically. Yes, I do love them.] for the whole game.


5:39 pm – work. We have lots of candy and candy canes at work.


8:40 pm – bathroom. My friend Mike does Mirror Mantras every Monday to fuel him through the week, which I have always loved. So this week, I decided to join in!  I figured my mom was going to take it down as soon as she went into the bathroom, but she actually liked it!


11:39 pm – kitchen. I have two presentations tomorrow – one on the overhand throw [honestly], and one is group teaching 6 and 7 year olds [aka our classmates pretending to be 6+7 year olds] to dribble a basketball.  We are playing a music game, so I did some fun GarageBand stuff for one of the games in our lesson!  [Kin win? I think so]

12 of 12 was created by Chad Darnell, and is now being hosted here!