music / on the road

going out in style . . !

• by kerri

I’ve seen a lot of sights and traveled many miles / shook a thousand hands and seen my share of smiles . . .

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I’m on the road today, quick getaway to North Dakota, so what better to do than make my parents question my sanity by rocking the Dropkick t-shirt and the green tutu with black jeans?

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The guy at Hot Topic (immediately pointed me to the Dropkick Murphys tees) and the girl at  Rising Bread Company (super good grilled cheese, by the way) dug it. At least they know what’s up!

I couldn’t really give a shit, I’m going out in style.

–going out in style, dropkick murphys

life / music

hallelujahs are for down on the floor

• by kerri

–champions of nothing, matthew good

carry me mother mary i’m faithless / like needles in haystacks the we just replace / it’s all the same monster that nobody faces where all is forgiven

on nights like tonight, when no one’s around i turn off the lights / and i float off the ground / and i smile like i used to when you were around / but truth be told i don’t know

–on nights like tonight, matthew good

 

hey midnight, turn on your lights. roll out your stars. /  i look tired but i, i feel wired and my body hums, like it’s coming undone.

don’t wanna be so wide awake . . . don’t wanna be so wide awake.

–odette, matthew good

There was little that was extensively emotional about last night as I thought a night like it would have been, just snap, kind of losing an hour and forty five minutes of my life.  I have been yearning for a night where I could simply stay awake and reflect.

I lost myself in it. I put my notebook down around 12:29 am . . . put the iPod on and earphones in, and laid in bed listening to Matthew Good. And eventually, the playlist cycling around on volume 1, I took out the earphones and hit sleep on both my Fitbit and SleepCycle app at 2:15 am.  An hour and fifteen minutes of my life that I have literally no idea where they went, other than into a zen-like spiral between asleep and awake. [This makes it sound like I was on drugs or something. I guarantee that was not the case, for it would be a far better explanation.]

Amazing.

The only thing better?  If I were actually on the floor . . .  Something about listening to another’s stories that resonate with you through the deepness of music while laying on the ground . . .

faith / music

“and what do i know . . . what do i know of holy?”

• by kerri

and what do i know? / what do i know of holy?

–what do i know of holy?, addison road

Holy. In both the spiritual and exclamatory forms of the word.

I have never been a fan of Evanescence. I had a couple friends in high school who were big into Evanescence, and I just didn’t dig them. Which is fine, but sometimes I just want so hard to like stuff related to music.  And then one Sunday we sang Bring Me to Life in church. And I was a little more open. I like when songs that were popular music can also align into a worship experience because they are not scary and preachy.  And then Bring Me to Life got on my iPod, and I danced to it. Not only is dance one of my favourite workouts, but I love that it can be such a spiritual experience, realigning my body, my heart and my spirit by letting my mind free.

And then I wanted more.

So this? This is so close to being so much of my story in a song that I didn’t write, much like Much Like Falling and Red Sam by Flyleaf.

i tried to kill my pain / but only brought more / so much more / i lay dying / and i’m pouring crimson regret and betrayal

i’m dying, praying, bleeding and screaming / am i too lost to be saved? / am i too lost?

my God, my tourniquet / return to me salvation / my God, my tourniquet / return to me salvation

do You remember me? / lost for so long. / will You be on the other side, or will You forget me?

i long to die

my wounds cry for the grave / my soul cries for deliverance / will i be denied?

Christ, tourniquet, my suicide

–tourniquet, evanescence

 

It causes me to ask why. Why would my God keep going after me after I screwed so much up?  
So amazing.
Holy.

Jesus said to all of them, “If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing to give up their lives daily to follow me. Those who want to save their lives will give up true life. But those who give up their lives for Me will have true life.“

Luke 9:23-24 [NCV]

I was not too lost. We are never too lost.

music

i hate christmas music

• by kerri

It’s the time of year that Christmas music is running rampant and driving me crazy, and sometimes I feel like the only person on the planet who is driven this crazy by Christmas music that I constantly have earphones in and keep Matthew Good’s Underdogs or the Foo Fighter’s Greatest Hits album loaded in my mom’s car CD player.

I love Jesus’s birthday and everything, but really, Christmas has become so much beyond Jesus’s birthday, and it’s not all bad, but some of the traditions and traditional songs . . . are just weird. And the rest that aren’t weird are played with unnecessary frequency in the weeks leading up to Christmas (or, in the case of the country station my mom listens to, I think they start about November 1st).

Fortunately, while catching up on blogs in the post-exam-induced feeling of nothing to do, Chad makes me feel less alone in my hatred for stupid Christmas songs involving grinches and any sort of Santa-related weirdness [for instance, “Santa Baby” just creeps me out].

If you feel the same about christmas music . . . then enjoy!